Working with some #metoo campaigns, I came across this tweet by Justice Markandey Katju about the movement and how he feels that it has done ‘some good’ in seeing some people being outed and brought to justice but how he can ‘foresee it giving rise to a lot of blackmail‘….and how ‘in the present climate, the woman will be believed…‘
And all I’m thinking of is how it takes a man hardly any energy to exhibit his privilege and say all these things – things of logic and well-bred thought in the midst of political fray.
So here’s the thing with privilege – even our brilliant, kind, wonderful men, our brothers, sons and male friends, don’t always realize that it is privilege that allows them to fully express themselves in society – the same society we all live in. Men and women are often measured with different yard sticks – even women of today, who in many respects seem stronger, are better educated, more vocal and professionally on-par with their male peers and counterparts.
I have to stress here, I do love men – I do love them for all that they bring in to the world, to society and to my life – I have two sons, a fabulous brother and have some wonderful close male friends.. But the thing is, privilege is something they were born with – and that is the norm for them. Privilege is what gives them the benefit of unconscious bias – at work, at home, on the political front, in spiritual pursuits, in religious fields, in hospitals, theatre, everywhere!
And yet, we hear the #notallmen response. Of course not all men are rapists, molesters, abusive partners… not all men, I get it!! BUT, that doesn’t deny that being male has a history of existential privileges that women across generations and centuries have not had – have been denied!
So, when the stifled voices start speaking up and a #metoo movement rises, the power of patriarchy does and will feel the tremors. And these tremors are uncomfortable because it is not easy to give up control, even for the good guys, because generally, being a member of the ‘Privilege Club’ without explicitly asking for it feels really good!! Even if it is not quite done… even if it means that for the same duration (generations & centuries), their ovarian other half of society has been silenced, marginalized, measured up with a tougher yardstick, told to prove their worth by managing work AND home because it is a woman’s job,…. (but again, #notallwomen ,no?)
The uproar that having exclusive women cabins on the Metro or reserved seating on buses or special counters for women at banks and hospitals (that no one really promotes if the woman is standing in the men’s line)… But we all know the men who stand in the men’s line and tell their women to go stand in the women’s line because it is easier and faster to get through.
It seems to bother a lot of people, no? This whole privilege thing… quite tricky indeed!
Now we have women speaking up and saying, ‘but we have the right to demand justice…’ And then we have men like Katju reminding people that women might start abusing the system with this sudden allowance of privilege & justice & laws that are giving them a voice.
To think that after centuries of women being put on the backburner, when they ask for equality, having a line dedicated for them is outrageous!! We want equality after suffering inequality forever? How did we dare to expect it?! So, if we want equality, we shouldn’t get a reserved seat, we should share it with the men…. ahem, share it with the men who had it all along…. and who aren’t going to part with that privilege so easily, you see?
Our sons and brothers and ‘husbands’ and ‘fathers’….. haven’t they been abusing their privilege forever? Of course, #notallmen …. but #notallwomen too, don’t you think?
Standing in support of #metoo and #metooindia Trust me, we can handle the privilege… it is our right.
Luvena's World 